Less Coherent

Susan's confusion and agitation continued even after I administered 2mg of haldol last night, but she did sleep continuously from 2am to 7am. In the morning, her confusion and agitation continued, so I administered some more haldol in addition to morphine as she complained about shortness of breath again. She continued to eat ice chips but has not eaten any solid food since yesterday morning.

A hospice aid came to bathe her, and a nurse checked up on Susan suggesting to take her off the haldol to see if she would be less confused. I have not administered any drugs other than the blood thinner Eliquis since early morning, but even though she is no longer agitated, she is restless and is barely speaking now. She is looking afar in a daze. The only words I can coax out of her are "I love you," after I say "I love you" to her and her expression comes out of the daze momentarily. As of tonight, she is no longer wanting ice chips, but is drinking sips of water when offered.

In addition to being off meds, she is no longer taking oxygen. It started with a rather unfortunate incident where the humidifier "jar" connected to the oxygen condenser came untaped from the condenser (I had duct-taped it there to keep it upright as this condenser has no "holder for the jar) tipped over when I was in the kitchen, and when I came out, I was startled to see water was gushing out of her nose. She was sitting up and responsive, and  I removed her canula and uprighted the jar. She didn't ask to be rehooked up and has been breathing easily since then, again, reiterating the psychological but not physical need for oxygen.

Another startling incident occurred when I was alone with her (Mina had gone back to her AirBnB briefly): I came back from going to the bathroom finding Susan standing up--she had always asked for assistance to go to the bathroom, but this signaled a new level of incoherence. I led her to the bathroom where she urinated and brought her back to the hospital bed, again, with no oxygen assistance. It was the second time I had led her to the bathroom to urinate after days of using the bedside commode, and she exhibited no tiredness or need for oxygen. It seems like in this new incoherent state, she has shed some of her physical limitations. These new developments are disturbing as I need to figure out a way to sleep and not have her get up out of bed on her own. I will see if I can move the couch that I am sleeping on adjacent to the bed so if she tries to get out, I will hopefully notice.